First You Cry

I found a card the other day that my mother sent to me in 1998. It was tucked inside a book that hadn't been touched for some time and fell out when I lifted it off the shelf.

It was a shock at first to see her handwriting. Like this was a note that had just arrived. I loved to get cards and letters from her. It was so exciting to see her handwriting on an envelope in my mailbox. Something good promised to be inside.

She was incredibly thoughtful. She had an amazing gift to find just the right card for you. Like she had created it herself; like it had been created exclusively for you. She'd send cards just to let you know she was thinking about you. She always made you feel like you were the most important person in the world. So special that I would have to call her to tell her how much she meant to me; how incredibly blessed I was that she was my mother.

This card, she sent after my then boyfriend of 9 years dumped me. Needless to say I was feeling down. It was sappy and sweet and was perfect:

"First you cry.
Second, you...well,
OK, you cry second too.
Eventually, you stop crying.
Time passes.

Then, one unexpected day, something happens,
and you find yourself
with an old, forgotten friend--
your smile.
When you catch yourself smiling,
you stop.
You feel guilty, maybe.

Until, finally, laughter.
It feels as good as it ever did.
You want to laugh again,
so you do.

And you live on.
No matter what stage you find yourself in today,
remember that I care."


She signed it: I got pretty teary when I read this in the store - it makes me think so much of you AND me. Take care of yourself Rabbit - we'll talk soon. xox Mema

It's still the perfect card. It's like she sent this, so many years ago knowing the sentiment would hold true for so many occaisions and that she'd always be there to tell me how much she cares... I just wish, so very much, that I could call her to tell her I know.